Tuesday, 21 October 2008

A Long-Expected Party

Today, soon after publishing the damage report, CERN is organizing the LHC Inauguration Ceremony. Given that the restart date is unclear (in private conversations, the estimate September 2009 appears most often), some lesser souls may feel dissonance. However, CERN is here to push the frontiers of science, and organizing an opening of a damaged accelerator is truly innovatory. The current DG himself must have had some doubts, as he cautiously writes "Dear Council Delegates, I would like to thank you for your reactions to my suggestion to maintain the LHC Inauguration Ceremony on October 21 2008, as initially foreseen...". Fortunately, the diplomats vehemently supported the idea, since they were already promised molecular cuisine.

Thus, CERN is overrun today by men in suits normally unseen at this latitude. This must be the first time foreign diplomats ever visit Geneva, so that unprecedented security measures were taken. All CERN parkings had to be emptied from cars, and those that remained are likely to be exploded. The roads connecting CERN to Geneva and France are now closed. The public buses that normally take this route run with a police escort, and they are not allowed to stop near CERN. It is not clear if the trespassers will be shot, or only impaled.

If you're curious what's on the menu, there will be a webcast here. This time there will be no live commentary, unless something funny happens. There is a rumor that during the ceremony the current DG will give a speech and vanish.

4 comments:

Lumo said...

Hi Resonaances! I have been watching the arrival of the delegations for quite some time.

The picture at the bottom of your article is funny. Did CERN employ Pat & Mat, the two Czech skillful handymen? They would be a good addition to Tommaso Dorigo et al. ;-)

De Bunker said...

I hadn't read the report until now. It says that electrical noise triggered heaters in nearby magnets. That sounds rather like a design flaw...

Jester said...

Yeah, unfortunately (or perhaps fortunately) the picture rings the bell only for Eastern-blockers :-)

Anonymous said...

This must be the first time foreign diplomats ever visit Geneva, so that unprecedented security measures were taken. All CERN parkings had to be emptied from cars, and those that remained are likely to be exploded. The roads connecting CERN to Geneva and France are now closed.

That's interesting since I, along with many other people, drove to CERN this morning. I parked my car in the lot outside building 513. Maybe I should go check that it hasn't been blown up!

And does Jacques Chirac count as a foreign diplomat? He visited CERN when he was president of France. And I believe Ch. de Gaulle visited CERN as well when he was president.